I recently chopped off the last four chapters of my book because I felt they no longer suited the story that I was attempting to create. It was the emotional equivalent to slicing my baby in half. I literally cried. I do feel that it was the right thing to do, but ever since my creativity for the project has been stifled.
I am sure there is some psychological reason why, and that’s fantastic, but that’s not really helping me right now. Every day I open up the word program and scroll through my work and type in a way that can only be described as listless.
So what do I do? I distract myself in the hopes that my muse will bite me. I look up recipes, I knit or sew, watch horror movies (because that always puts me in the mood for romance,) make gifs, giggle over cute animal videos, play video games, visit the library, mess with my doll collection (don’t judge), I read, and when all that fails I clean.
It’s getting to the point where my house is organized. It’s insanity.
I guess my issue is this. My first ending was typical. MMC and FMC confess their love, come together and overcome the obstacle that has been set before them and end up together. Happy-Happy, Joy-Joy. But as I started to write it the little character voices that live inside my head were like “Dude, stop.”
I wasn’t writing the story of Claire and Owen, I was just mimicking the stories that I had read before, in my own words. I was a genre parrot who was trying to force my round story in the square peg. You’d think that once I realized this and corrected the words would just flow, right?
Yeah…not so much.
What’s happened now is that I have an ending. I have a plan for one at least but I’m pretty much terrified that people are going to read it and feel like I cheapened them because it doesn’t go the way that the paranormal erotic-romance normally does. I’m afraid that readers will be upset and wont read any of my future work.
So here is my question: Would you read a story about two characters who had a sexual relationship but ended up being friends at the end rather than romantic lovers? Not because of some great emotional tragedy or something like that, but because they both realized they just weren’t romantically compatible, even though the sex was great?